


little niceties

by Anonymous



Category: Vinland Saga (Manga)
Genre: Brother/Brother Incest, Casual Ableism, M/M, Period Typical Attitudes, Rated for subject matter, Sibling Incest, canon age regression, torgrim has a semi-wholesome family interaction for once
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2019-12-11
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:28:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21753010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Torgrim takes it upon himself to handle a certain matter behind his brother's back.
Relationships: Atli/Presumable Canon Wife (Vinland Saga), Torgrim/Atli (Vinland Saga)
Kudos: 2
Collections: Anonymous





	little niceties

**Author's Note:**

> This came out about as wholesome as it could be considering the circumstances but I want to assure everyone that Atli was only soothed to sleep by much incestuous billing and cooing.

Mommy is really fair about everything, but Daddy is really nice. And sometimes when Jutta and Palni are fighting, he'll just give them both something good to eat instead of saying who's right or putting them on separate chores until they forget, like Mommy would. They try to fight in front of Daddy, when they remember.

Uncle Torgrim is nice sometimes, but it's not nice like other grownups are nice. When they tell you stuff you didn't know, or give you cool things or make you feel smart. When Uncle Torgrim's nice he's a lot of fun, and he likes playing with them and the other kids. Jutta and Palni have to distract him when he wants to do snowballs or swords with the neighbor kids, because he's not allowed to and the parents get mad. Jutta tries to act like Daddy when that happens, and give him some of her food to cheer him up, because even she can tell it's because he's big enough to hurt them, and it makes her kind of sad that he can't figure it out.

Other times Uncle Torgrim acts like the other grownups, pretty much, except some of the work he does is different. He always looks a little mad when he sees other men chopping wood and skinning animals from the woods. Jutta's trying to get brave enough to ask him why, but she might end up asking Mommy about it instead. She's not always sure Uncle Torgrim likes her when he's acting like a grownup.

Daddy is Uncle Torgrim's favorite person no matter which way he's acting. Daddy can get him to go to sleep on time and eat porridge—Daddy can't even get Jutta to eat porridge, and she thinks Uncle Torgrim hates it just as much as she does. When he's a grownup he won't eat it at all. Once Daddy said, "She gets this from you, I hope you know," and Uncle Torgrim got mad for the rest of the meal. Jutta doesn't know why. He has to be their real uncle, because everybody says he and Daddy grew up together in this house, and then went away to fight together for a while, and then came back together. So they have to be family, which makes him her family too. And everybody knows things run in families.

He forgave Daddy right away, though, because Daddy can always calm him down. 

_"...reminded of..."_

_"...it out on them..."_

_"...know, I know..._

They think she gets to sleep a lot sooner than she really does.

Daddy's been getting really tired in the evenings lately. That happened last year, around the same time, and probably the year before, but Jutta was too young to remember then. It's not too bad, just dropping little things and stumbling for a second or two, but it's scary to see Daddy do things like that. He says it's just old memories wearing him out. Whenever it happens Uncle Torgrim jumps up really quick and takes his arm until they're all sure he's fine. He does it so fast even Mommy doesn't have a chance to get to Daddy first.

Jutta comes home one day before she's really supposed to be there, just because she's been thinking all day about Daddy. She's worried. She can clean inside the house or something, that always needs to be done. But Daddy wasn't out working anywhere, and she's scared he might be so tired he got sick.

She opens the door quietly in case Daddy's asleep. And he is, just not where he's supposed to be asleep. He's in Uncle Torgrim's bed, with his hair down and everything, and Uncle Torgrim is holding him and playing with his hair. Jutta plays with Mommy's hair sometimes, because Mommy has nice hair, but the way Uncle Torgrim's doing it is different, somehow. The look on his face, maybe. That reminds her of something, too. The way Mommy and Daddy would look down at Hallwarth when he was just a baby. But it makes her feel nervous, because there's something else there. Like she isn't supposed to be looking at this and neither is anyone else.

The door closes behind her before she can decide to go away after all, and Uncle Torgrim's face is terrifying for a second when he looks up, before he sees it's just her. Then he just looks annoyed.

"Don't wake him," he says. "I've just got him to sleep."

She nods. She knows how to be quiet.

Daddy moves a little then, and Uncle Torgrim catches the back of his head very quickly to stop him turning around. "Who're you talking to?"

"No one," Uncle Torgrim says. "Nobody's here. You're too jumpy. Get back to sleep." He gives Jutta a sharp look over Daddy's head.

It really does feel like she's not even there in the room. Uncle Torgrim just looks down at Daddy for a long, long time, longer and softer than she knew a person could look at another person. She has to turn her eyes away a few times, she feels so uncomfortable watching it. Finally he looks up again. "Go on, get out. Careful with the door. And don't tell anybody about this."

It's a couple of days later when Uncle Torgrim catches up with her under the eaves of someone else's house. She was doing weaving inside all morning with Mommy, until Mommy saw she was about to scream and let her go outside. She went to go check on Daddy in the fields, and he looked fine, and Uncle Torgrim must have seen her then and followed her.

"I got you this. Look, it's a little birdie."

"What kind of birdie?"

"How should I know? It's any kind of birdie you want it to be."

He can't carve things himself, Jutta remembers. He must have bought it. She accepts the wooden birdie and holds it solemnly cupped in her hands, not sure where else to put it.

"Look," Uncle Torgrim begins. "I've been taking care of your dad ever since I could move on my own. And when your brothers are all grown up and swinging swords around, or hoes, or whatever, I'm still going to be taking care of your dad."

"I know. ‘Cause you're his big brother."

"Exactly." That seems to please him. "Your dad's a good man. But he's had a harder time of it lately than he deserves."

Jutta knows something happened to Daddy, right before where her memories start. He used to go out of the village for a while and come back with money. But then he stopped doing that. "That's why he gets tired?"

"Yeah. I swear, he's given me more worry in the past few years than—anyway, he's a good man. He's a good father, and a good husband. And a good brother."

"Uh-huh." She knows Daddy's a good father, and he's nice to Mommy and he works, which makes him a good husband. And a bunch of the other kids had a big argument once, about what they'd do if their brother ended up like her uncle did, and more than a couple of them said they'd put him right out to sea in a little boat with no oars. Which means Daddy must be a _really_ good brother.

When she told Daddy about that (she had to, because he saw her crying a little) he went outside right away, and she was scared he might really hurt somebody, because she never saw him so mad before in her life. All the kids were quiet around her for a while, and she never found out what happened, except when Daddy came back that night it was the first time she ever heard Uncle Torgrim calming _him_ down.

_"...rolled their eyes at you, where do you think the kids pick it up? They'll get a few swats and learn to keep it in the house next time. That's all you can hope for."_

_"I can hope the parents don't need reminding what we spent half our life doing to villages just like..."_

_"Let it go, you're a family man now."_

_"...not totally castrated yet, you know." (She might have heard that one wrong.)_

_" ...every day. I'm used to..."_

_"...it does, that doesn't mean...!"_

Daddy loves Uncle Torgrim so much, it's no wonder Uncle Torgrim loves him so much back.

"So what I'm saying," Uncle Torgrim says, "is some ways I take care of your dad might be embarrassing for him, if anyone found out. You're old enough to understand that, right?"

Jutta looks down at the birdie. "Is that why you got me this?"

Uncle Torgrim sighs. "You're that jaded already, eh? Yes, that's why. I'll get you as many birdies as you want if you promise to not tell anybody about what you saw me and your dad doing. Including your mother."

"Okay." She doesn't really want to tell anyone, anyway. It made her so uncomfortable she doesn't want to be talking about it now. And it must be something that could get Daddy in trouble, because that's the only thing Uncle Torgrim would care about. She doesn't want to get Daddy in trouble.

"You promise? On your family's honor?"

"I promise." She moves the birdie into one hand and closes it up safe. " _Our_ family," she adds quietly, looking down at the ground.

"What? Oh, right. Right. Well," he says, tapping her awkwardly on the shoulder for a second, "now we understand each other..."

"Uncle Torgrim?"

"What?" He moves back as if trying to dodge a punch.

"I like you when you're acting your other way. You're really nice. I don't think people should be mean about it."

"Nice!" Uncle Torgrim groans. "Is that what it's come to?"

"It's kind of like you're my brother, when you're like that."

"Oh, gods, I hope not!" It's more to himself than to Jutta, and he laughs after a second, like he was joking, but her lower lip starts to tremble anyway.

"Do you not like me? At all?"

Uncle Torgrim looks at her for a moment, like he's really thinking about it, and she's about to burst into real tears when he speaks. "Well, Atli helped make you, so I guess I can't keep from liking you."

Atli is Daddy. It's funny to think of him having another name, but she's getting more used to it as she gets older.

"Look, you'll give both your parents heart failure if you ever say I'm like a _brother_ to you, so why don't you keep that to yourself as well."

"You're sure you really like me?"

"Look," he says again. "The only kid I ever liked much was your dad, and I was a kid myself back then. You're all right, for a kid. You can't help..." He clears his throat. "Well, I'm getting used to you."

When he's the other way, he really likes spending time with kids. Even if he still likes Daddy better. But Jutta learned a long time ago that Uncle Torgrim barely ever hears you when you talk to him about that other way he is, so she doesn't try taking it any further. "It doesn't seem like you like other grownups either. Don't you like anybody besides Daddy?" Daddy is nice, but it makes her sad thinking about being like that.

"Oh, I used to be a real social butterfly." He sounds mad again, in that way grownups get mad about something they're not really telling you. "Me and your dad, we helped make this village as big as it is. We had to work a lot harder as kids than any of you ever will. They respected me when I used to come back for winters, I'll tell you that much."

She knows what he's talking about. Daddy told her that Uncle Torgrim used to be a really brave warrior who fought for years in all kinds of places, until someone hit him really hard in the head and he couldn't do that anymore. Daddy says he was always with him, except when that happened, but Jutta's not sure she believes Daddy ever fought anybody.

"Hard at work as usual, eh?" It's somebody else's daddy, she doesn't remember who but she sees him sometimes, coming by to pick his kids up when he needs them. He's walking by with a big piece of animal meat on a spike, which is one of the things Uncle Torgrim can't help with much.

Jutta can tell he's being mean, and she sticks her tongue out, not caring if he sees her being rude.

It makes the other grownups mad that Uncle Torgrim can't work like other men, even when he's not acting like a kid. Even if he works all day doing the things he can. And you're supposed to have your own wife and family, when you're his age. Jutta doesn't see why they care so much, when they all have their own families to take care of, and she and Mommy and Daddy and Uncle Torgrim all get the work done fine between them.

"Daddy would get really mad if he was here," she says, looking up at Uncle Torgrim.

"He doesn't need to hear about this."

"But he could do something. Grownups won't listen to me or you, but they might to him."

"And I could strangle any of those grownups I wanted to, easily. I'd do it if it wasn't for your dad." He looks down at her, and it feels like their eyes are finally meeting for the first time. "Look, don't let your dad fill your head up with a bunch of nonsense about being fair and nice. It only makes life harder. Just look at him, worrying himself sick about how to feed three and a half children every winter."

"Daddy's not going to get sick, is he?"

"No," Uncle Torgrim says. "No. Not with me around to take care of him. About the only thing I can do for him anymore."

"But..." She doesn't like that being fair could ever be a bad thing. "Daddy loves us. And he loves Palni and Hallwarth even though they can't do hardly anything yet. And you love Daddy."

"If you get me started on that, I'm going to owe you a lot more birdies."

Jutta's not really sure what he means by that. "So you must love Daddy for being nice."

Uncle Torgrim sighs hard. "I just wish I'd been able to teach him when to stop giving a shit."

He doesn't need to tell her not to tell anybody he said _that_. But it makes it feel like they're having a real grownup conversation. So she nods and tries to look like she thinks that word all the time.

"That's why he doesn't need to hear about any of this. He takes it to heart. He'd feel like a bad father if he knew you saw us like that."

"I won't tell him. Or Mommy."

"Not that you should be keeping secrets from your parents," Uncle Torgrim warns her. "Though I'm hardly one to—but this is a special case. I give you special leave to keep this from them. Just this. So we don't upset your dad."

He puts a hand on her shoulder, in a more friendly way this time, and she gets up the courage to ask something. "What was Daddy like when he was my age?"

"He was adorable," Uncle Torgrim says, without blinking. "A hundred times cuter than you are."

For a second she's sure he's joking, but he doesn't crack.

" _Daddy_ used to be cute?"

"What do you mean, used to be? He still is! When he..." Uncle Torgrim twitches his nose a couple times like Daddy does when he drinks out of a mug, to keep his mustache dry.

"That's not cute, that's just a Daddy thing."

"It's a cute thing! You've never seen a little bunny rabbit doing exactly that?!" He's really mad, but it's over something so silly that it's just funny.

Jutta giggles. "Bunnies don't do it ‘cause they have great big mustaches that get into everything. And tickle when they kiss you."

Uncle Torgrim opens his mouth and then closes it again really fast. "Er, yeah, well," he says again after a second. "As long as you promise not to tell anybody, about... that thing, including your parents. You'd better be getting along, we've both got work to do."

"Do _you_ promise to act like you like me?" She's feeling braver around him now that they've had a real grownup talk.

"I'll work on it," Uncle Torgrim says, gruffly.

"You can keep this, then." Jutta stuffs the birdie into one of his big hands and dashes off.

"What?" His voice rises behind her. "What am I supposed to do with a toy? I didn't buy this just to keep it for myself!"

"You're just hanging onto it for me," she calls back. Everybody likes having toys around, she's sure of it. Anyway, she knows he has a little box of things that remind him of when he used to go sailing. He can just keep the birdie in that box until he changes back to his other self. Right next to the ring that Daddy sometimes wears the other one of.


End file.
